Well, it's my turn to be sick. If this is how R felt, I now have even more sympathy. My throat hasn't been this sore in 9 1/2 years. My glands are HUGE!
But I went for prayer after church today. I could actually feel my ears opening up and sensations in my glands. Not completely healed physically, but God did a work in me on other levels.
Seems this week, he's been speaking to me about rest and hope (which interestingly enough, are the first two candles of Advent). At Breathe (mom's group at church), that message of hoping in God was very strong, as well as waiting on Him. Psalm 42's "Why so downcast oh my soul? Put your hope in him," and then Psalm 62's "Find rest oh my soul in God alone. My hope comes from him," have been so precious. And that all came out in the prayer time as well. As they were praying, a peace descended on me so strongly in the form of a picture of me hugging God and having my head against his chest.
I didn't think the issue of rest (ceasing from striving etc.) was that big a deal for me until I broke down and sobbed when one of the women said that I didn't have to work...I could just be me (something to that effect). After that is when the peace came.
Anyways, it's been interesting to see how free I've been to work in my kitchen (after I cleaned it yesterday after enduring ten days of mess). It seems like a contradiction, but perhaps it's like reverse psychology. I don't have to...so I want to.
And even though I'm sick and I just desperately want someone to take care of me instead of me taking care of my family, I know that someone is taking care of me. And it's all going to work out.
As I was washing dishes yesterday, I was reminded of what I'm always trying to emphasize to J: that "can't" often isn't really true...it may be hard and we might not want to do it, but we can do it if we try, and if we still can't, we can always ask for help. "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength". It's funny how we can teach our kids the things that haven't quite sunk into our own hearts.
I pray that the message of advent is finding it's way into your soul and that hope and peace come into your hearts and homes.