Well, I must congratulate myself. I am posting something within the same month as my last post. I've just been visiting some other people's blogs and been inspired. (However, maybe not inspired enough to actually write anything). But like my stream-of-conscious journalling, I'll just keep typing and maybe something of interest will come to me.

Last night, I did my "Ten Beautiful Things" right before bed. I think it will become a ritual. I will get one of those tiny spiral-bound notebooks and maybe even one for my hubby (and we can both do it! yeah...we'll see about that) Anyways, it was neat to look back on the day and recount the good things and then share them with Rod. He was pretty psyched that I counted our '76 Ford F150 Supercab longbox as one of them!

One of my ten beautiful things was helping someone in need. We met up with an acquaintance at church on Sunday who has having a hard time financially. So we invited him over and he did some work for us and I had a fun time putting together a bag of food for him. (A kind of motherly thing came over me!) Learning about the "web of exchange" has really helped us to see the importance of this. We're still not over our own financial woes, but we were still in a better position than he was and it was so satisfying to helphim!

On another note, it's really amazing to me how an apology can change the whole dynamic of relationship (note to self: remember this in marriage when the last thing I want to do is admit my wrongdoing). I feel like a huge thick grey curtain has been removed and I can look this person in the eye and get to know her. And I think it will be a pathway to further relationships with women (my big goal and big challenge this year...I seem to be friendship-impaired, whether it's a fear of intimacy...and possibility of rejection/abandonment...or the natural result of a life on the move...or some previously unhealthy "dependent" relationships). I'm really trying to struggle through these issues and develop some solid friendships, even with my sister, in-laws, and mother.

In a similar vein, I've met some people that I feel I really share a commonality with. How do I approach them and pursue further relationship with them? How do I express to them how much I can identify with their personality, their history, or the things that they currently struggle with or find particular joy in? My life in Winnipeg thus far has not made huge allowances for time for this. We've been in such a survival mode, trying to start a business, pay our bills, renovate our house, and then start a family. How do other people make time for significant relationship? I'm hoping in the next year when we have a more stable income and schedule to be able to connect more with people. I'm just not used to inviting people over (that's always been Rod's job...and he's always been so busy that he hasn't had the energy). It's too bad my site isn't open for comments. Or maybe it could be and I just don't know how.

I should probably go do something else while Jacob is still sleeping...

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